In Matthew 7:12 Jesus said, "So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you." In light of Jesus' words, we need to carefully choose the words we speak to others because the truth is that we are going to be a product of what we say. We are going to eat from the fruit of our lips (see Proverbs 18:21).
You can create the life you want with the words you speak. If you want grace to come to you from others, you have to extend grace. If you extend grace, grace will be extended to you.